27 nazis sleep in the oven when a dog is eating a muffin in the snow...

s s a b e n i l o t a w t a y b n w o d f o m e t s y s

2004-12-02T03:46:16Z

Guess what it is and win a prive: 5 5 3 3 7 7 8 8 10 10 8 8 7 7 5

Brittany is the best!

2004-11-14T06:48:49Z

Thank u brittany for all the work u put into my lj! im srry i dont update it as often i should. ill try to do it more often. thank u again! :)

Excuses

2004-11-03T22:47:35Z

The following is a collection of "actual excuse notes from parents (including spelling)" from the Office of Educational Assessment at the University of Washington.

My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31,32, and also 33.

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

spwinstonian @ 2004-10-22T12:50:00

2004-10-22T19:54:15Z

This is a and email my step cuz sent me

>>       30 Things Guys Want Girls To Know!!!!

>>       1. We're not as perverted as you think we all are.

>>       2. No matter what YOU say, your ex-boyfriend IS a LOSER.

>>       3. We like you to give us hugs and kisses sometimes too.

>>       4. Don't argue with us when we call you beautiful.

>>       5. Don't treat us like crap, what goes around comes around.

>>       6. We know you're pretty, that's one of the reason's we're
>>going out with you.

>>       7. Don't go into detail about your period. It scares us.

>>       8. If you have cramps and we ask you what's wrong, just tell
>>us it's that time of the month and nothing more.

>>       9. If you really liked us for us, you would let us think
>>that our mustache, beard, or sideburns looked cool.

>>       10. We never shave our legs. So get over it.

>>       11. NEVER ask us if you can put makeup on us. It's just
>>wrong............

>>       12. Don't make bets about us, because one of your friends
>>will tell us, if you don't.

>>       13. When we tell you that you're not fat, believe us.

>>       14. We absolutely do not care about the Backstreet Boys,
>>*NSYNC, 98 Degrees, or what any other guy looks like for that
>>matter.

>>       15. We may not be able to pee accurately all of the time,
>>but at least we can stand up and go pee.

>>       16. Just cause you think you're always right, doesn't mean
>>that you don't have to apologize when you do something "wrong."

>>       17. You expect us to say and do sweet things for you, but it
>>would be nice if you did the same every once in a while. We like to
>>know that you love us.

>>       18. We can't always be spontaneous, so try to help us make
>>the plans sometimes.

>>       19. Don't ask us to beat up another guy for you, cause you
>>might get what you wish for.

>>       20. Never kick us in the nuts "just to see what we would
>>say". That's just mean.

>>       21. Never pretend like you are going to break up with us and
>>laugh when we believe you.

      22. Pamela Anderson's boobs aren't fake anymore, but we like
>>yours better anyway.

>>       23. Size doesn't matter, except to idiots who don't want a
>>relationship.

>>       24. PMS is not an excuse.

>>       25. If you want us to put the seat down when we're done, you
>>should put it up when you're done.

>>       26............ Don't tell us how cute your ex-boyfriend was.
>>That doesn't turn us on.

>>       27. And always remember: The way to a guys heart is through
>>his stomach..... and maybe....oh nevermind.

>>       28. NEVER ask us to kiss other guys. You might be that comfy
>>with your friends, but to us it's just wrong.

>>       29. We always notice how funny it is after your rip out our
>>heart, stick it down our throat and still want to be friends.

>>       30. And last but not least: We know you're not always right,
>>but we'll pretend like you are anyway.

poor poor child

2004-10-21T03:40:41Z

tomarow lilly starts preschool. little does she know it is the begining of hell. just think about it, the first day of 14 years of school. if she knew what she had coming up she would run. run forever, never stop running. when she got tired she would still run. let us all take a moment of silence for her.....

Damn Family

2004-10-18T02:40:40Z

There is 4% of a 2% chance of me getting a new guitar, my 3 year-old step sister "lilly" still hasnt grasped the concept of commercials. Whenever she is watching a show/movie and a commercial comes on she thinks someone changed the chanel, then screeches for somesome to change it back. My brother "andrew" whinning for me to let him on, and my step mom nagging for me to do the dishes. My sister "gracey" talking to her boyfriend "gary (a male cheer leader)" hours upon hours making it impossible for me to call for a ride home from aarons. My ten-year old step sister "iris" playing hot crossed buns over and over on her recorder, and my 7 year-old step sister "violette" crying because she cat have icecream. And my dad just napping in his room, which is bad/annoying. Damn my family.

#2

2004-10-08T00:54:54Z

We can all take a taco wagon to Catmando in the winter of july, only if the salmon fly their spoons of destruction into the land of applesauce and negativity.

Sunrise

2004-10-07T03:08:34Z

Here is a poen me step bro wrote me:
Sunrise

soon the sun shall rise
in this hollow sky
and finish this long
blank-eyed night
crushing a cricketish
ocean of shed leaves
and cicada shells
a distant watchman
swept by the chilling frost
whispers
"half of creation
is destruction"
shivers briskly
breathing and eating
cotton puffs
in the searing chill
crisps through unlit hulks
rusting on their manufactured feet

a freezing gust rushes
through the graffittied concrete
and straight rows of trees
the conflageration
of crinkling cellophane
is a drizzle
tempestuous in the hush

bright commuter lights
swing past, wash
a spooky black
old slapped-together log shack's
anachronistically
glittering glass;
the same sentry checks doors as
a bonging clang
rings seven
and the drizzle turns to snow
in the feeble half-light.

The clouds are now
silhouetted in the
grey-blue
and distant streetlights
die like lightning bugs
bedding down.
"Shed tears for old joy,"
whispers the grim wan sun
peering through its dismal veils
"I am the dawn
of a new day."

#1

2004-10-06T22:55:34Z

We can smell granola only if sandals eat all the goldfish by the tank of buttons and trees with all the kids in a line on chaos.

Are you guys happy!!!!

2004-10-06T03:14:38Z

There are you guys happy? uv all been telling me to make a live journal, and here it is.